Be Where Your Paws are….(and other lessons from Charlie)

Have you heard the saying, “Be where your Feet are?” You know, be present, be mindful, be here now. Instead of letting your thoughts of the past conjure up sadness, anger, frustration or fears of the unknown in the future creating worry and anxiousness, allow yourself to be in the now.

Where are your feet right now? Mine are set on the floor under me in my office area of my apartment. Which means I am in my office, writing or working. So be where my feet are, focus my attention and therefore my energy on my fingers typing, my mind creating this story and body feeling the feels that I am sharing. My mind may wander, and I bring it back to here and now.

How often are we not where our feet are? Very often our mind has us in stories that take us back or thrust us forward, and we aren’t giving the now any attention. When we are in the past or in the future, we are usually skewed negatively, our brain has a negative bias.

Watching Charlie, he is always where his feet are. Each morning before 7am, we are out the door for our longest walk of the day. We usually walk about 1.5 miles in the morning before it gets too hot. Charlie is always wherever those paws are, focused on what is in front of him. He admires the sand and the surf, the grass and the flowers. He sees people and gets pet and sniffs new doggie friends and meets up with others he has gotten to know in the 6 months we have lived here. He savors every second of what is happening at this very moment. He is the epitome of connected to everything and attached to nothing. He walks away from one thing, having faith that something else that he will be happy about will be next. He is always in gratitude and expecting abundance.

Being where his paws are allows him to really enjoy the moment. No matter what is going on around you, enjoy the moment in front of you. If you don’t like something move away from it. He doesn’t stay and smell something that doesn’t hit him right, he just moves on. Humans tend to over analyze why we don’t like something, we may feel as if there is something wrong with us because everyone else likes it(whether it be food, a type of music, a show, anything!). Many times, the people pleaser in us comes out and we don’t want to say we don’t like something. So we stay with it, try it again, etc. Charlie, walks away, done. No pressure and no worrying that I am going to think poorly of him. Charlie doesn’t judge, he doesn’t know the meaning of judgement.

When Charlie is where his paws are, he also allows everything he’s feeling to come through. No hiding his feelings, he feels them. No stuffing them down with food, alcohol or any other addictive behavior, he lets his emotions out. He laughs, smiles, cries, gets angry, shows frustration, allows himself to feel what he needs. Once it is out, he’s done. He doesn’t continue to focus on it, stay angry for days, etc. Let it out, move on.

Some lessons are about what not to do. Golden Retrievers are known as people pleasers, always wanting praise for what they have done, even if it just going potty outside. The focus is getting validation from others that he is a good boy. He doesn’t seem to be able to trust himself that he is a good boy. He needs accolades and pets to feel loved, and worthy. We have all been raised in that paradigm. If I get “x”, then I will feel “y”. If I lose 10 pounds, then I will feel sexy. When I get that promotion, then I will feel successful.

All of it is conditional. We have lived most of our lives in the false paradigm that our happiness is conditional upon things and people outside of us. This is what keeps us chasing. And makes us question our worth so we keep trying, making investments, buying the thing that is supposed to make us feel happy. None of that is actually true. Happiness is a choice, not conditional. Charlie doesn’t realize that, we can. Charlie doesn’t know how to learn to trust himself and who he is evolving into, we do.

Don’t be like Charlie, learn to trust you and choose how you want to feel. Don’t be like Charlie and look to everyone to make you feel how you want to feel. The circumstances outside of you do not have to create the feelings inside.

So, be where your paws are and allow yourself the freedom to be in the now. The more you do, the better you will feel.