I recently saw a quote that read, “You often feel tired not because you have done too much, but because you have done too little of what sparks a light in you.” It made me think. It goes with the thought that very often it isn’t our body that is tired, it is our soul because we aren’t lighting it on fire. We go through life, just doing, very rarely being. Very rarely are we excited about what we are doing, learning, growing into, gaining joy from. We just do. I know at least I did far longer than I wish I had. Doing things that light you up, excite you, push you…that’s living life. Whatever it is, if it puts joy in your eyes and peace in your heart, do more of it.
Careers very often become things we just do, versus doing something that lights us up, that excites us. I loved my 35 year career in Human Resources. I liked different things about different roles in different companies and industries. And I liked most of it. There were tough situations, endings and beginnings, but all in all I liked my career. The last year in corporate, at Prudential in Connecticut was the worst year of my 35 year Human Resources career. I was filled with catabolic energy, reacting to everything as a victim, angry, frustrated, self loathing. I was unhappy and couldn’t hide it. That of course only made it worse. People who once called themselves my friend distanced themselves from me. They even publicly criticized me in meetings. I worked with some awful people who looked at the world through a lens that is all about they win, you lose, a world of duality. Their negative energy was draining to all, but I was triggered. My sense of self-worth and esteem were injured through all of this, I pitied myself! What came first, the depression or feelings of self-doubt and pity? I may never really know the answer to that. I did know I couldn’t do it anymore, I needed to be lit up!
What I do today, that lights me up. This is me, this is aligned with who I am, how I am and what I want to do to help others. My lens is much broader now, finding opportunity and possibilities in everything. I am no longer tired, I am energized. I am no longer drained. I am awake and vibrant. I am no longer negative. I am optimistic and focused on the good. Watching people shift and respond more consciously makes me feel as if I have changed the world. At least someone’s world. I spent time really figuring out what excited me, what was missing in my life besides freedom, feeling of empowerment. I reflected, meditated, worked with a coach and listened to gurus of positive psychology and coaches.
I always like to share this one way that could help you begin to hone in on what lights you up, what excites you? Spend two weeks logging two columns in to a journal…1) Love it and 2) Loathe it. Everything you do, touch, think, write it under the one of those columns, you either love it or you loathe it. At the end of 2 weeks look at your lists. This is your starting place! Review, think bigger, look for relationships; what words jump out at you, what tasks jump out of you? Use this to test, experiment, play with it. What brings you joy?
Don’t settle for just going through the motions of life, working, working on your house, working on your relationships, fitting in a dinner every now and then. Live life, be lit, allow the spark. You may feel a difference, you may feel alive.