Connections

“When connections are real they never end.
They simply die and are reborn” ~ Maryann Hasnas

Lying on the bed, the room getting a bit lighter as dawn breaks through, the outside world began to stir. The soft breathing of my friends as they lay warmly tucked in their beds serenading me. The air has a little chill yet I am far from cold. The top of the bare trees peak through the window and allow me to see the next set of mountains beyond the ridge. The smell of the last evening campfire surrounds me, caught in my hair. The waves of love and nostalgia overtake me with this group of friends, we haven’t hung out as a group in many years. We have been friends since high school, spent a lot of time together for many years and then life got in the way. I drifted in and out of the circle, they remained a circle. Yet I have never felt as an outsider and in fact during this weekend I felt as if the circle had always included me.
The laughs were at a peak. We enjoyed current stories and rehashing the stories that were etched in our minds. We were never at a loss for conversation. Our hike to the ice beds connected each of us to nature, our own souls and each other. We cared for each other along the way, and enjoyed vistas and views that took our breath away. There is a connection among these women that is palpable. We care, we love and we do not judge. We could be vulnerable and silly all at the same time.
I was apprehensive at one point about going on this weekend jaunt to Vermont. I hadn’t been with these women as a group in a few years and wondered if I still fit. They also didn’t get as much time together as they would probably like and was I intruding. Those fears took hold a bit, I wondered if I should back out. I’m so glad I didn’t. During the weekend, I was reminded that real connections never end, they may change over time, but then they are reborn, as the connection with this group was reborn, and will continue to live on.
As I think about this quote, I realize that my last 2 weeks had a few of these moments, connections that really never end, they die and are reborn.
We just laid my best friend’s mom to rest. Talk about connections that never end. The impact she made on all she touched was obvious as you saw the packed church. She lives on in each child and grandchild, her kindness, her thoughtfulness and her complete love of life was on display with the touching tributes and the casual conversations. Her connection to all is very real, and will always be there. Her family will carry on with her message of love, a full cup of life, wrapped up in kindness and laughter. The connection is reborn in everyone who was touched by her as we each try to live like her, a kind word for everyone, doing for others instead of yourself. Her ability to connect with people is something she handed down to each of her children, and her grandchildren. I had the honor of being touched by her, being made part of the family by her. My connection to her will never end either as I try to live my life a bit more like her, with love, kindness and service to others at the top of the list.
While at the wake and funeral, I reconnected with other friends, from high school and from grammar school. Again, people who have drifted in and out of my circle due to life, for all of us, talking as if we never missed a beat. Discussing how we need to get together, this seeing each other at wakes and funerals wasn’t good enough. Catching up on life, embracing each other where we are, with no judgement, just love.
Real connections don’t end, they may change, they may drift a bit here and there, there is no straight line. Most relationships have a zig zag line from beginning to end, that is the impact of life, of jobs, of other people, of our own thoughts that make it zig and zag. But when that connection is real, to the soul and to the bone, it is reborn. The relationship comes back in a new form that fits into life as it is now.
Feel blessed by the real relationships and connections in life, they are rare but they are there. They never die, they may zig and they may zag but they will be reborn.