“There is only a stream of well-being that flows. You can allow it or resist it, it flows all the same.”
Work harder, we are told. Work smarter, we are told. No pain, no gain. You and only you can create the outcome that you want. You have to hustle. You have to keep your end goal in mind and fight to get to there. Follow the rules of the road, work all of those hours, have things done your way. Push, pull, get your ideas out on the table, focus on the end result that you believe is right.
That is what we do. That is what I have always done. And of course that is a low energy, that is a right/wrong energy. It doesn’t allow for creativity, it doesn’t allow for a different ending, maybe a better end result. Instead, it is filled with musts, and have-to’s and of course the dreaded “should’s.” We “should” all over ourselves when things don’t go the way we planned.
My entire work life was about working harder, pushing harder, making things happen. Yes, I was “successful” in my work but it wasn’t filled with joy. And most importantly, who knows what could have been created had we pushed a little less and allowed for new ideas, other thoughts, inspired actions and natural unfolding of things. Not easy concepts in corporate America, that is true. But what about in our own lives.
When we are wedded to the outcome we want, we never see that there may be a better outcome for us, if we allowed to be guided more and be open to the stream of well-being. Most of us spend a lot of time resisting that stream because we know better.
When I decided to retire from corporate, my dad was worried and concerned. He knew I wasn’t happy in my role or in my company any longer. He knew I felt stuck, felt tired and really not healthy. His fear though got the best of him, and he wanted me to resist the guidance I felt I was getting to move on. That guidance had been haunting me for a few years as I began to consider what retirement would look like. I worked with a coach and I went on my spiritual journey to open myself up to possibilities that were no longer tied to making money and having “power” but were tied to joy, happiness and gratitude. The possibilities were tied to what my coach called my genius, my super-power, my purpose per se.
Dad’s words to me were, “milk them for every penny, don’t just leave.” The guidance was too strong for me. I knew staying at my company would continue to beat me down, leaving me the shell of the person I was, and not recognizable to who was meant to be. I saw signs all around me that said it was time. People who for years were my advocates were no longer as supportive as they were only concerned with themselves. New people joined who were mean-spirited and power hungry. Leaders blaming others for their shortfalls and inability to actually lead. My body no longer appreciating waking up at 4:30am and commuting to work, it was fighting me. All of the signs were directing me to move on, it was time. Once I made that decision, everything started to fall into a new place.
I lost some things through it, a friendship that I treasured and thought could be more completely changed as I exited. I lost a little bit of identity for a short period of time, and lost friendships that I thought traversed the workplace and found that they did not. What I gained was so much more. I was free. Free to follow my heart not my head. Free to follow the flow of the stream of well-being instead of fighting it, resisting it with what I feared and what I thought was the outcome I had to have. I remember considering my finances. My planner told me I had to make a certain dollar amount in order to maintain my standard of living so that money would not run out before I was 95 (since I was retiring 4 to 5 years earlier than my original plan). My standard of living. I no longer cared about that. I no longer cared if I could buy whatever I wanted, I didn’t need it. I knew that my lifestyle had been built somewhat on my need to fill voids and I wanted to release that. I embraced a new way of being where there isn’t as much of a plan. And the freedom of that, the freedom to let things flow and see what comes up for me as I move toward whatever is calling me is better than I ever expected.
I spent years resisting the flow of the stream of well-being, because I knew that the outcome I planned for was best. So not true! This outcome so far is so much better than I could have ever imagined. To know that I have clients who count on me to support them, help them shift their energy to joy and healing, gives me more joy than I ever received in corporate. To know that I have the freedom to create and try whatever I want is a freedom of the spirit! I do more from my heart than my head, and feel more aligned than ever. Each year something new calls me. And no longer am I tied to an outcome of a goal.
I focus on intentions, on a road map of a vision and allow for inspired actions and creativity to flow. I focus on how I want to feel and not what I want to do. Those feelings create actions that I believe are co-created with the universe. I have never felt more guided and less hamstrung than right now.
We all may fall into that habit based on what we have learned through our lifetime, we must work harder to get to that goal. We may be wedded to an outcome, and that outcome may not be for our highest good, but we resist seeing that. I now open myself to any and all guidance. I work toward the feeling I want to feel, and allow for the shifts and changes that get me closer to that feeling.
The shift from resisting the flow of well-being, which we do by not allowing for changes but focus on one outcome, has been liberating. Focusing on the feeling you want to feel will enable you to open up to new and different ideas, actions, and align you with what is to the highest good.
Last year, my dad said, “You have changed since you left corporate. You are happier and healthier, I get why you left when you did.” He no longer worried that I needed the money, he saw that nothing, no money, was worth what it was doing to me. And at that moment, I knew the guidance I had received and was receiving was truly looking out for my highest good.
What are you doing to resist the stream of well-being? What shift would you make if you knew you were supported by a stream of well-being?