The quiet of the morning, just as the sun is peaking over the horizon, is a moment blessed by God, the Universe, or whatever is believed. The stillness of the air, the sound of a wayward bird just awakening, the sound of snow crunching under the feet of a deer all encompass the feeling of jubilance for a new day. It is a moment without judgment. It is a moment without fear. It is a moment by which we no longer need to rehash the past or worry about the future, but relish in this blanket of now. Take in the stillness. Take in the possibility of anything can occur, life doesn’t have to be so scripted. If we could only live this way more.
Noticing a bird checking out a new branch reminds us of the quote, ““A bird sitting on a tree is never afraid of the branch breaking, because her trust is not on the branch but on it’s own wings. Always believe in yourself” – Unknown. So much of our fears are created by situations in our youth, patterns of behavior based upon either what we learned was right or not right, or the pain that has been inflicted upon us. So many of us are afraid to try something new, or to allow for a new pattern of behavior or a new belief because we have been conditioned to feel a certain way based upon what has happened in the past. And that has served us well, look where we are today.
What would happen if we shed these old beliefs and patterns and allowed ourselves to be new each day? What if, like the bird, we trusted ourselves more and cared less what anyone else thought? What if, like the sun rising each morning, we viewed each day as a new day for us to be who we are at our core and not the beliefs that have been instilled in us?
I started this blog 5 years ago. That first step to write my inner most thoughts was so very scary. It was with much consternation that I began to write, as I knew I would be allowing myself to be vulnerable. I had learned at a fairly young age, that being vulnerable to show all of me, to show the sensitive me, to show the inner me, would create fodder to be made fun. I was chided by my siblings for being to sensitive. I was chided in school for being overly sensitive. I was chided in the workplace for allowing my emotions to show through. So I had to become tough as nails, build a wall around me, so that nobody could judge or make fun of me. I used sarcasm, anger, frustration and my intelligence to fight back. Becoming a perfectionist where everything had to be done the way I wanted, and done really well was a defense mechanism to be sure I wasn’t made fun of in the workplace. For me, fear of being vulnerable, of allowing my true self to come through allowed me to a tough. It allowed me to stand up to the workplace bullies, most of them men, who thought they could walk all of me and others. It allowed me to be the tough executive that the workplace wanted me to be. It didn’t allow me to be me. It didn’t allow me to show my heart.
Writing, along with many other tools, allowed me to show my heart. It has allowed me to begin to peel those layers away and find my truest self, the self that I love. I don’t care any longer if I am made fun of for crying, for being emotional. I allow myself to feel what I need to feel. That fear of vulnerability has begun to be shed. With that fear beginning to diminish, I care less about what anyone thinks. I care less about what people expect from me and more about being true to me, trusting myself and the universe to guide me to what is for my greater good and the greater good of those around me. I have learned that changing and evolving, healing old wounds and peeling away the layers of dust that people and situations have put upon me has created a me that I trust. A me that I love.
The quiet of the morning, the newness of each day, allows for this transformation to happen day by day. It doesn’t happen all at once, it happens subtly, moment by moment. All of a sudden, you awaken to find that you have embraced a new way of living, a new thought process, a new belief system. And it matches you at your core, finally.
Each new day gives you that opportunity to shed your fears and be You.